Walking Into the Fire

As I’ve walked down the road, I’ve seen this faint glow in the distances. It looked like a river shimmering in the distance. Stretching out on both sides as far as the eye can see. The closer I got the more the picture changed. The river had a faint orange tint to it, like it was reflecting the final rays of a sunset. As I get closer still, the picture becomes even more distinct. Fire. A river of fire. I look at the path I’m on and it leads me right through the middle of it. My eyes begin to swing, wondering, hoping that there’s another way: a bridge maybe, to go over it. My steps have slowed. My heart is racing. I’m at the threshold. I hear the faint call, “Will you walk with me?” I know the voice of my Friend, my Savior, but He must be mistaken.

“You want me to go in there. You want me to walk through that!” My heart cries. The heat from the flames can be felt in my innermost being. My pride rises up within me. “I don’t need to walk through there. I’m fine.” The more it cries out, the more I realize that this is the path I need to be on.

I’m afraid. There is no way this is going to be easy. It’s going to hurt. I’m going to be crushed. “Are you sure? Are you sure this is the path you have for me?” I cry out to my Friend, my Savior.

“I will be with you.” He gently reminds me, “This is for your good.”

I know in my heart what He says is true. He has never lied to me, and has promised He never would. I also know that I can choose not to take this path. I can choose an easier way. I know there’s something beautiful on the other side. If only I could find another way to get there, but that would only lead me to death. I have to walk this path, so I will know what is on the other side. All I see is fire. Flames of death. Flames of life.

My knees are shaking. My stomach wishes to release its contents. My heart races out of control “This is for your good.” My Friend, My Savior whispers.

“I know but I’m so afraid.” I take a deep breath. I close my eyes. I take a step.

I’m in the river of fire. I feel relief. I’m alive. And immediately I feel frustration, anger, “why do I need to be here?!” I yell.

Pride looks me in the eye, Rebellion at his side, and says, “You don’t need to go this way. You’re better than this. You don’t need to be here.”

I fall to my knees and confront his lies. “God resists the proud.” I remind myself. I don’t know when he’d become so big. And Rebellion, when did he get here! Where did they come from?

There is only one place. But I can’t look there. What else would I find if I did? How did this happen? I open my eyes. Still on my knees, my reflection shimmering off the face of the river of fire. I see something that disgusts me. I see… my heart.

I pray. Then stand up. And begin my journey.