Do you have one of those friends who just gets you? I do. We laugh and joke and have more in common than I think even we know. Like we just found out the other day we even have the same A+ blood type, which is kind of weird in a good way. Especially when she explained it the same way I do. Wow, you'd think we had grown up together, but the amazing thing is we didn't. God brought her into my life a few years ago.
Let me say this, I love ALL of the wonderful friends God has put into my life, but there's something that's sometimes difficult with all of my wonderful friends (they're older - like I'm closer to their kid's ages than I am to there's with the exception of one we're only 10 years apart). Now these women are wonderful and I am truly grateful for them, but honestly sometimes we just don't have the same things in common. And so when you're looking for someone to relate to what you're going through it's hard to be sympathetic when you're in two different seasons in life. And so I did what I always do when I'm distressed: I took it to God in prayer. Now sometimes my prayers are more like whining and I can honestly say that it was mostly whining. I prayed, "God please I need a friend." I needed someone who would understand what I was going through, had been through, and wouldn't settle for my whining.
And then God brought her into my life. Let's just say, I wasn't so happy about it at first. She came in (in my mind) knowing everything, comparing everything to how it was done somewhere else, and was built up by the people around me as the epitome of wonderful, and so I went from being wonderful to forgotten. I didn't like that so much. So I did what anyone would do, I complained, I got frustrated, and then I remembered a famous cliche "keep your friends close, but your enemies closer." Now she was in no way the "enemy," far from it. But if I could learn from Mrs. Wonderful than that would be good because then maybe I could get some of my spotlight back (I know totally selfish, immature, and vain.) So the first day we hang out we're both doing the uncomfortable dance around topics until finally she says to me, "I have ulterior motives for having you over." I breathed a sigh of relief and admitted that I also had ulterior motives. We laughed about our awkwardness and began our new friendship. It was that simple. Since that time we've shared our hearts with one another and become great friends: sharing laughs, tears, wisdom, and so much more. I am truly grateful for the answer to prayer that God has given me.
I say all that to say my friend is very sick. She doesn't want pity, and even walking through this personal hell she has been a source of strength, wisdom, and grace. I can't say many people in her situation would handle it with as much care as she has. I went with her the other day to a doctor's appointment for her youngest daughter and on the way home we began discussing Job. She asked how long Job was like that and I said, by the sounds of it, it was a long time. As she began sharing her heart with me, I looked at her and said, "You don't have Job's friends."
A couple days later, I spent an hour and a half reading the first 17 chapters of the book of Job. At first I was reading to see if there was any indication of a time period. And as I thought, there was not. And so as it came time to read what Job's "friends" had to say, I started to skim it because they're absolutely ridiculous. And then God reminded me of what I've been teaching the kids on Wednesday nights: the Bible is God's word, God-inspired, and God-breathed. The whole Bible. As I read what Job's friends had to say I realized that what they were saying was true: God is the judge, only he knows the hearts of man, God will bring correction. The problem with what Job's friends were saying was their application to Job's life. They felt that Job must have angered God by sinning to cause this to befall him. But that wasn't the case.
As I read this a thought struck me, how many times in trying to help someone do we cause more distress by our good intentioned wrong advice? We don't have all the answers and sometimes our finite minds won't understand the will of God, but there are definite things that will always help: prayer, a smile, and being a blessing.
If God gives you a word for someone, test it. Read your Bible, take it back to God in prayer, if it continues to stir your heart and you have found Biblical evidence for your word, then take it to the person. But take it in love. In the Spirit of meekness.
God often will not reveal the why of a situation. Because that's not the answer He's looking to give. The why is insignificant. Job's friend's answered the why of his sickness and misfortune completely wrong. The Bible says the rain falls on the just and the unjust. We live in a sin-infested, fallen, dark world. And that's why bad things happen. But God says, "That ALL things work together for good to them that love Him and are called according to His purpose." And I have no doubt in my mind that my dear friend loves Jesus more than anything in the world.
And so dear friend the question to be asked is not why, but how. How can I serve Job? How can I love Job? How can I bless Job and his family? How can I minister to Job? How can I lift Job's spirits? How?
By answering this question you will fulfill the will of God for your life. The Bible states that the greatest commandment is to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. And the second is like it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as yourself. So love the Job in your life. Be a true friend to Job. Let them see your love displayed in your acts of kindness and generosity. Be a blessing to Job!
